Musings

I love being a muse. For as long as I can remember my friends have asked me to be in front of the camera to help bring their creative ideas to life. Though I remember a time I wasn’t always comfortable in front of the camera, that isn’t the case any more.

I by no means consider myself a model, cause LOL, but it is something that I’ve grown to love to do. Recently a few friends and myself got together for a collaboration, but this time I chose to sit behind the camera. I thought it was the right choice… for whatever reason. But as soon as we got to the studio I was wishing I was getting into my wardrobe and standing under the lights.

Then I realized: am I jealous? am I a narcissist? am I scared of missing out on the experience EVEN THOUGH I WAS THERE?

Well it really boils down to: It’s because I actually like it. I love being a muse! and yeah I was probably a bit jealous, and maybe I am a bit narcissistic, but thats gotta be healthy in moderation… right?

I’ve got to do some pretty cool things with my friends! From being Little Red and Maleficent, to editorial shoots for school projects, and Gothic looks! It’s so much fun, and I love to play dress up! I always make a character for myself. Who is she? What is she feeling? I love getting into it!

It’s like my time to pretend I’m on America’s Next Top Model.

It wasn’t always easy for me to be in front of the camera, or for those photos to be on display, but it’s been a way for me to learn to love myself.  It’s easy to want to pick myself apart, especially in a time when the media tells young women they shouldn’t be proud of themselves, or that they shouldn’t celebrate themselves. That they need to look a certain way, even though LITERALLY NO ONE DOES.

So yeah I can be a bit of a narcissist, and sometimes I hate missing out on experiences, but if I’m that much closer to feeling comfortable in my own skin then who f***ing cares!

Love Yo’ Self

Xo Tiana

Some photography for your liking:

Loch Evergreen Photo & Film

Natalie Smith Photo

 

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